இ Year of 蛇 Snake 2013

The Water Snake slithers in un-officially after midnight on 04Feb2013 according to the solar calendar referred to as Lìchūn立春 *pinyin*.  Traditionally Lìchūn or Laap Chun in Cantonese signifies the beginning of spring in East Asian cultures with special village events, worship and offerings to the gods and ceremonies for a blissful and prosperous new year.  It marks the beginning of another cycle for being the very first day of spring when the sun is exactly at the celestial longitude of 315 ° which is divided into 24 solar terms in a year. However the Chinese New Year which is based on a  lunisolar calendar often referred to as the "Lunar New Year"  calendar incorporates both sun and moon (yin and yang combined ) cycle elements  falls on 10Feb2013 in the Year of the 蛇 Snake.

We will be ushering in the Chinese New Year pretty soon and here is a special mention to Autumn Belle who sparked this entry with her comment in Dec2012 and it goes like this [P/S: hope you'll do a post about auspicious words to say for CNY for us bananas to learn and show off during the CNY season]. For fellow bananaz like me hope this few idioms can assist you to over come some of the challenges in wishing friends and relatives with nice four little words or so called favourable Chinese idioms. Hope the translation is in order and would appreciate the help from those Chinese educated readers to point out any mistakes or adding in more idioms, your feedbacks are most welcome. Bananaz was so embarrassed when a lady with a videocam zoomed right at my face requesting for a nice four little words in Chinese during a CNY dinner gathering as nothing could leave the lips as Bananaz was dumbfounded.

 蛇年大吉
pinyin: shé nián dà jí
cantonese: se4 nin4 daai6 gat1
english : lit. snake year big luck
[very auspicious / extremely lucky in the Year of the Snake]

龍馬精神
pinyin: lóng mǎ jīng shén
cantonese: lung4 maa5 zing1 san4
english : dragon horse full vitality
[with full vitality and spirit of a dragon & horse]

萬事如意
pinyin : wàn shì rú yì
cantonese : maan6 si6 jyu4 yi
english: lit. 10,000 things according to your wishes
[may your 10,000 wishes come true]

大吉大利
pinyin : dà jí dà lì
cantonese : daai6 gat1 daai6 lei
english : lit. big luck/propitious big gains/profit
[great luck great profit]

五福臨門
pinyin : wǔ fú lín mén
cantonese : ng5 fuk1 lam4 mun4
english : lit. 5 fortunes approach door
[5 blessings bestowed upon your household (ie longevity, wealth, health, virtue & a natural/peaceful death)]

招財進寶
pinyin : zhāo cái jìn bǎo
cantonese : ziu1 coi4 zeon3 bou2
english : lit. ushering prosperity enter treasure
[ushering in wealth and prosperity]

生意興隆
pinyin : shēng yì xīng lóng
cantonese : sang1 ji3 hing3 lung4
english : business prosperous
[may you have a prosperous/flourishing business]

金玉滿堂
pinyin : jīn yù mǎn táng
cantonese : gam1 juk6 mun5 tong5
english : gold jade fill hall
[may you have abundance of wealth]

迎春接福
pinyin : yíng chún jiē fú
 cantonese : jing6 ceon1 zip3 fuk1
english: lit. welcome spring receive fortune
[to welcome spring/joy to receive fortune]

Gong Xi Fa Cai & Happy Holidays and May All Your Wishes Come True 心想事成 *pinyin*xīn xiǎng shì chéng; *cantonese*sam1 soeng2 si6 seng4.

Read more »

இ Tireless Tyre

How many of us really take an interest in the tires or tyres we put on our car?  Tyres can seem awfully technical (how many of us know our tyre size or minimum speed rating?). Who has the time to get educated on a new tyre purchase but to depend on our local tyre store or auto dealer for good advice? Well, we’d all agree with the old saying that “an informed consumer is a good consumer”. Would it not be better if you know what questions to ask after a little research? Most likely you can get a much better tyre for your needs, dramatically improve your performance and driving satisfaction, save you money and might even save your life. You do not need to take such high risk scaling treacherous mountains in snowy condition seeking answers, search no more get answers from AutoSquad 'All About Tires' & TireRack.



In about a week's time for those celebrating the forth coming Chinese *water snake* New Year would be in a mad rush preparing for balik kampung (return to village/hometown). Mass exodus from the cities for home during this festive season would expect heavy flow of traffic on all highways. REMINDER: Presume your motor vehicle has been serviced and in tip top condition if not do it ASAP. Not forgetting tyres are the backbone of a car and not to be neglected. Hopefully the videos below can be of great help to clear your doubts on managing your own tyres.

 

Image courtesy of simpletire.com

Side Wall Tyre Code :
[I]. P 185 / 78  R 14 82 S
P - Passenger Car Tyre
185 - Width of the tyre tread is185mm at the widest point
75 - Aspect ratio indicates the height of tyre sidewall is 75% of the width (139mm)
R - Radial 14 - this tyre fits 14" wheel
82 - the load index, maximum of 475kg (1050 lb) per tyre
S - the speed index, maximum permitted speed of 180 km/h (112 mph)
M+S - mud & snow

www.abcnews.go.com

[II]. {4202} - Age of tyre, production date on '42nd week Year 2002', shelf life of tyre is 4-6 years. Tyre Danger: The cryptic code that could save your life..abcNEWS





Summary: kPa to Psi Pressure Converter
1. Tyre Pressure: Inflate tyres in the morning, not forgetting your spare tyre
2. Rotation: Every 6 months or 6000miles or 9700 kilometers
3. Alignment: At least once a year


 
When to Replace Tyre? If the tread depth falls below 2/32" or 2.3mm its high time for a replacement of new tyre (s).


Over the years we have been using this word tyre or 'tayar' (in Malay) so often think there is no surprise many may not remember or know what it is called in Chinese? Even my late papa would say, 'tayar pump chat' lit. its in English for tyre puncture. Bananaz rarely hear the Mandarin word for tyre until cross checked with sweetie Mango on the actual term in Mandarin *pinyin* (are you ready?) tada.. its 輪胎 lún tāi.




Tyre experts have demonstrated and proven on the safety of placing new or least worn tyres at the back axle instead of front for better grip when cornering, which we have not been doing it right over the past decades. Not all tyre store  owners or auto dealers are aware of this latest research.

Wishing ALL a pleasant and enjoyable ride home. Drive safely and carefully and please DON'T speed.

"Gong Hizz Fa Cai"

         

Read more »

இ 人有三急 : URGENCY

When Bananaz was a little boy will often hear family members coming back home rushing through the front door  yelling *人有三急 rén yǒu sān jí [pinyin]; jan4 jau6 saam3 gap1 [cantonese] : lit. 'people have 3 urgency'* and heading straight to the toilet in a jiffy.  Instead of saying 'excuse me' the message was loud and clear enough for us to make way for the 100m sprinter to dash through. Living in a home where Mandarin and Chinese dialects monopolized all communication with hardly any English, Bananaz will only have to silently adapt with open ears. Knowing pretty well *人有三急 rén yǒu sān jí  : lit. 'people have 3 urgency'* means the same as to answer the call of nature.  That's cool so we have in total two kinds of urgency either a big or small call, now what about the third urgency then? At that tender age Bananaz could be too naive to question further or maybe he did ask but in vain.

This same idiom re-surfaced at college while Bananaz was waiting impatiently, mumbling and grumbling at the dining table as patience was rapidly wearing out. Just about to switch into angry mode  one of my buddies commented: "Hey! Hungry is not stated in the idiom of *人有三急 rén yǒu sān jí : lit. 'people have 3 urgency*, let me tell you what are the threes".  AHA Bingo! Bananaz was jumping in joy to have found the 3rd urgency after a lapse of time. Unconsciously the hunger instantly switched to jubilation mode. Eureka! here is the answer: 1. Urinate  2. Defecate 3. Sexual.

 An amazing blogger [SK] who gave me the inspiration for this post who prefers to hold on to his big call. To find out why? Plz click HERE

However not quite as yet still not the correct or complete answer for the idiom until Bananaz googled recently. Imagine learning Chinese the hearsay way all through out life from a little boy to adolescence until adult to get to the real meaning of this idiom.  Learning is never ending.

What is so URGENT about this idiom * People Have 3 Urgency人有三急 rén yǒu sān jí * :
[ 1 ]. 内急 nèi jí lit. 'internal urgency' consist of urinate and defecate.
[ 2 ]. 性急 xìng jí lit. 'sexual urgency'.
[ 3 ]. 心急 xīn jí lit. 'heart urgency' ie impatient / hurried.

[ 1 ]. 内急 nèi jí : lit. *internal urgency* consist of urinate or defecate
That's how you would have jumped when you are holding on to answer the call of nature.


[ 2 ]. 性急 xìng jí : lit. *sexual urgency*.
A just newly married couple on their very first wedding night who are too impatiently in love.


[ 3 ]. 心急 xīn jí : lit. *heart urgency* ie impatient/ hurried
Another close example of 心急 xīnjí  would apply to an impatient/anxious husband pacing to and fro outside the hospital ward while his wife is delivering their first baby. CAUTION: Be careful not to view this video on a full stomach as it may cause stomach ache or ROTFL.

Read more »

ക WhyAskWhy¿ ~ Ah Long 大耳窿 *Big Ear Hole*

Strange enough this name 'Ah Long' has been accepted en masse by a wide variety of ethnic groups in Malaysia. WhyAskWhy on the origin of this notorious name for money lender aka Loan Shark come into existence? Hearsay the name originated from Hong Kong where those days  the person who loans out money are called Chettiars, who love piercing their ears and wearing big earring.

As years go by the hole at the ear lobe stretches bigger and bigger. The same effect would apply to the loan that they give out as most borrowers are unable to repay the loan when the compounded loan amount gets bigger and bigger, just like the ear piercing hole, hence the Cantonese called them "Dai Yee Long"大耳窿 daai6 ji5 lung1 literally *Big Ear Hole* a colloquial term for illegal loan shark better known as Ah Long or Along in Malaysia and Singapore.

It is very common for Chinese to replace the middle name with "Ah", so as to be more friendly or closeness? Maybe this should trigger Bananaz to post about in future. Come to think about it all my siblings are of no exception where their last name is after the word "Ah".  Some examples will be like 'Ah Soon Fast Food' or 'Ah Fatt Noodles'. Therefore it is not surprising for 'Dai Yee Long' to become Ah Long *啊窿*. 

Ah Longs are one of the worst in graffiti with zero skills in spray paint on the walls of the house or property of defaulters. Their only best art is to paint "O$P$" meaning "owe money, pay money". Bananaz is not elaborating on their threat of violence suffered by the borrowers or their family members. You can read more on "Stay Away from Loan Sharks or Being Risk Eaten Alive" from  Seniors Aloud.

What is the difference between a Bank and Ah Long?
Some said no difference at all, except that loan sharks are unlicensed and can be imprisoned for what they do, whereas banks can do the same legally. Banks would require some time after the paperwork for approval of loan but its pre-approved almost instantly by Ah Longs. Somebody has said Banks won't break your arms and legs like what the Ah Longs are doing, well they're right instead a bank will break your spirit.  Borrowers go to the Banks dealing with sweet elegant customer service officers. Ah Longs come to you with tattoos all over their body. (disclaimer: not every persons with tattoos all over their body are Ah Longs). HERE is a true life story of one blogger who had gone through hell with Ah Long for being a guarantor.

 

Above is a live performance by Afdlin Shauki aka Chief Kodok & Din Beramboi as guest artistes in AHA2 portraying them selves as 'Along from Bukit Beruntung'. Sorry the video is not very sharp and its in Bahasa Malaysia anyway its basically a comedy show of how Ah Longs solicit for business with no requirement of IRB returns form, Bank's 6 months statements not needed and no guarantor involved. But if you don't pay up chances are the Ah Longs will mutilate your fingers or  arm. They ended the song naming the various branches nationwide and the number to call @ 24/7 service ext 12.
 

Read more »

இ Alive and Kicking *2012*

Mmmmm ... Mmmmm ...I get wings to fly..Oh, oh ... I'm Alive sings Celine Dion...

Yeah oh yeah we are all alive after so much hoo-ha for the whole of 2012. Nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh take that whoever are responsible for the doomsday hoax, a fraud and a cruel and blatant lie scaring the hell out people that something terrible is going to happen, then publish books and videos on "how to survive the apocalypse" just like the same Y2K scare. The problem with people some how some will fall for the scam who tend believe it. They choose to waste their money buying fake information on "how to survive". Some people will buy worthless survival kits, and some will even buy spaces in shelters that are not going to be built - ever!. Rumours that electricity would be cut off with no water supply for weeks. So instant noodles is the number one hot favorite food stacked up, bursting the kitchen cabinet.

 

Fingers were all pointing at the Mayans for creating the chaos which to some experts defended that they did not prophecy or predict 2012 Doomsday. This day of 21- 12 -12 also happens to fall on the Winter solstice of the year. The Solstices is an astronomical event as well as one of the most important and major festivals celebrated by the Chinese and East Asians during the  冬至Dōngzhì Festival lit. the beginning of Winter solar term, a celebration for a bountiful harvest before taking a winter break and to begin again after the Spring festival which is the Lunar Chinese New Year.

 ♆What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal.♆ ~ Albert Pike

Now that doomsday has caught everyone's attention we cannot deny the fact that death no longer exist to be swept under the carpet just because its dreadful word? There is some truth to this saying, “There are only two things you can count on in life: death and taxes.” Everyone experiences death. Death and dying are an inevitable part of human life.

The above word is 死 sǐ *die* a strictly no-no and a taboo among the Chinese community as most people must refrain from mentioning or hearing it as though the sound vibes could kill. Due to the homophones (sǐ ) for *die* sǐ  and number *4* 四 sì having the same sound most Chinese are shying away from this number but conveniently replacing it with 3A which is widely accepted.

 ❥Since the day of my birth, my death began its walk. It is walking toward me, without hurrying.❥  ~ Jean Cocteau

Who said it's not the years you love but the life you live? (Answer is at the bottom.) Presume you shall live until 80 years old how well you plan to spend them wisely is entirely up to you. Time and tide waits for no man. 'You can't turn back the clock. But you can wind it up again'. ~ Prudden, Bonnie.

❖And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.❖ ~ Abraham Lincoln


 ✤Dying is easy, it's living that scares me to death.✤ ~ Annie Lennox

These people from Ghana are indeed very open minded and creative. So have you ever thought of your own funeral or the coffin design before? Yeah some would definitely utter "choy choy choy" immediately. Only two person I know have done their afterlife arrangement while alive and kicking. As the saying goes "Why let your children go through Hell when you are in Heaven?". One is a Canadian blogger Uncle Lee and the other my late papa who had his grave and tomb completed at age 50 with a pre-booked ancient Chinese shamrock coffin made from huge, bulky and heavy chengal wood and he lived on till 92 years. Bananaz would love to have a coffin in the shape of a F1 race car, but then there may a slight technical problem. Accordingly Heaven refuse to accept Bananaz and Hell is afraid Bananaz will take over so where on space or earth is Bananaz gonna drive his F1 Formula car then? Be contented and make do with the banana shape coffin will do.

 ♔A very prestigious cardiologist died and was given a very elaborate funeral by the hospital he worked for most of his life...A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service as all the doctors from the hospital sat in awe. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.

At that point, one of the mourners just burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said, 'I am so sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral... I'm a gynaecologist.
The vicar fainted.♔


Just another few more minutes to bid 2012 Goodbye, Bananaz would like to wish everyone a blessed 2013 with super abundance.

Read more »