இ Crazy Times..

While brisk walking around our apartment one beautiful morning with Mango these round circular objects above caught my attention to see them neatly arranged in regimented order.  Is there a medical term for a person who has a phobia over direction. A friend's friend will always constantly ask for NESW direction 'where am I now'? So what can we gather from these parabola dish? Thinking..shall give you 1 minute..oh need more time OK how about 60 seconds then.   

That's right all of them faced WEST. If you need to know the compass direction when buying a house or apartment the dish would be a good guide as they need to face west for clear video streaming reception until unless Astro upgrade the MEASAT-1 satellite to face South.

Besides having great business acumen is not good enough. One must have creativity and dare to be different to stay ahead. Look at how creative the owner of this shop coming up with this eye-catching banner. Written in Malay "TAUKEH SUDAH GILA! CINCAI CINCAI JUAL!" the direct translation "Bozz Gone CRAZY!, Simply Simply Sell!" The Chinese version '平平賣/卖 píngpíng mài' meaning "Cheap Cheap Sell!" and the bozz claimed to be the Malaysia's No.1 CRAZY! Probably the bozz can see home light at the end of the tunnel.

Two colleagues were having a good belly laugh about receiving a SUV on his 63th birthday from lovely wife. Could not help myself laughing at their hilarious expressions. Incidentally a transcript from BBC Learning English "The combination of a good guffaw and exercise is said to stretch muscles and trigger endorphins - the chemical in the brain known for its feel-good effect." What is so overwhelming to receive that *sport utility vehicle* SUV? 

S - socks

U - underwear

V - viagra

[confession: the SUV is a joke but the two blokes are my colleagues, most importantly we share the laughter and be part of the laughter yoga like the saying goes, laughter is the best medicine..~;).]

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இ Back To School..

A Caucasian friend was scratching his head wondering how we Malaysian Chinese speaks English? He may be very surprised to meet someone who speaks impeccable Queen's English with no flaw. Politely he asked Bananaz do we encode our thoughts in Chinese arranged them in proper sequence, decode then speak out in English? Wow never thought it was so complex, maybe Bananaz is exaggerating here by adding salt and vinegar. No longer the case now, but as a kid we do faced that challenge of transferring Chinese data word for word to English. Bananaz neither read English newspapers *none at home only in Chinese but can only browsed at the pictures coz Bananaz can't read Chinese* nor have the habit of reading books during his childhood days therefore you can roughly guess the end result of his grade in English. Dear readers please execute excuse me and bear with my English, it would be even better if you care to point out my mistakes especially my rotten grammer would appreciate it very much.

Unlike my daughter Nikki who scored straight A's in her English through out her primary and secondary school. When during our shopping, she was less than 4 years then, would sit on the floor to read while her old folks take their own sweet time in picking the right choice of dresses. Knowing pretty well she's not allowed to read while Papa Bananaz is driving, she would hang on to that page and flipped it open when we stopped at red traffic light. To save cost would rent books from Noble Book Rental in Carnavon St, Penang where she gets her weekly supply of books. As years go by she just loved reading, even buying books with her own pocket money. Wonder what reading speed she would clocked at to finish J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter within four hours. Phew I take my hat off to her. So bottom line is kindly encourage and support your children to READ! READ! READ! more.

Take a trip down memory lane with Bananaz and back to school with half-past six Enggrish:

இAbout school fees: 
Bananaz : Sir no bring come (Hokkien ~ 'boh gia lai')沒帶來 *pinyin* méi dài lái

இTo the lavatory:
Bananaz: Teacher can go pass water? (Hokkien ~ kee pung jio)
Nikki: Can I take a leak?

இBicycle with flat tyre:
Bananaz: My bicycle no wind. (Hokkien ~ kar chia boh hong) 

இMine:Yours:Whose:
Bananaz: That red book is mine one, yours one is the black one. This green pen is whose one?

இOthers:Misc:
Bananaz: Why like that one? (Hokkien ~ aun chua aun neh kuan)

Care to add in more Chinglish? The more the merrier.

Note: Hokkien is the dominating dialect in the Northern Region though Bananaz's mother tongue is Hakka.   

We often hear this phrase or seen Bing Crosby's show about "Kids say the darndest things", kids could also DO crazy damnedest things.

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இ No School

That's right when as a kid we often say this 'Tomorrow No School' on any public holidays or term holidays. Hope we are not the proximate cause of heart attacks for our English teachers then, perhaps Suituapui got to thank his lucky stars for not having this bunch of students like us in his English class.

It has been a week since schools nationwide in Malaysia are closed for the annual 7 weeks final term holiday. What a temporary relief as the number of road hogs within the premises of schools and highways during peak hours are at a minimal, thus a smooth flow of traffic. HappySurfer blogged about school is out where her colleagues are clocking in early at work with better mood. Also a tremendous relief for parents who need not have to get up extra early clutching the steering wheel in anxieties, braving traffic jams sending their children to school. Those who shuttles back and forth daily to office by car would have some relaxation on their brake pedal, well at least until schools reopen next year.

Not sure about the rest, Bananaz had mixed feeling during his child hood school holidays. Jubilant over a few weeks break but some how over shadowed by sadness of being broke, no school equals no money! Back in the 60's, my 30sen pocket money were given by Papa from Mon-Fri only, weekends and holidays makan sendiri *eat your own*. So 10sen for a packet of take away economy noodles bought early in the morning while on the way to school to be eaten at recess time. How nice by then the noodles had doubled its size because of the curry gravy and the balance of money after drinks would straight go into my porcelain rooster money box supposedly for emergency use only and that emergency is everyday during the school holidays lolz. Wonder how much pocket money are the kids receiving from their parents nowadays? Wanna share some of your experience?

Most Chinese character derived its words from pictorial drawings and over the years the word 'car ' from a pictogram of a cart/chariot gradually transformed to car 車 *pinyin* [chē].  Enjoy the video clip to learn more on the illustration of the strokes and pronunciation. The simplified version is 车.

 

A car車 is no longer a luxury any more but a necessity which is a must for every household. Anyway, Bananaz would make an exception for [SK] & SeniorsAloud who travel by other means of transport which is their preference. Human beings are strange creatures..they send their car on the dot for preventive maintenance when it reaches every 5000km on the odometer, replacing spark plugs, oil filter and engine oil etc. True enough a car is paramount but how many would make it a point to go for medical check once a year which is just as important? Well, when was the last time you have taken your battered body for a blood screening test or a dentist check up? Do you know your latest BP rate and cholesterol level? Would like to reiterate here, many are falling into this pitfall of chasing wealth when young at the expense of health but when older to spend wealth chasing back health. Just a friendly reminder please go for a full medical check up NOW ~ Just Do It!


OK relax since tomorrow no school and no office, its a public holiday, let's have some fun with numbers. This is very freakishly accurate to find out..your role model.

WHO IS YOUR ROLE MODEL???
Try it without looking at answers below (plz don't cheat)
1) Pick your favourite number between 1-9
2) Multiply by 3 then
3) Add 3, then again multiply by 3 (I'll wait while you get the calculator....)
4) You'll get a 2 or 3 digit number
5) Add the digits together into a single digit







Now with that number scroll down do a match to see who is your ROLE MODEL from the list below:

ROLE MODEL: 
1. Albert Einstein
2. Barack Obama
3. Mother Teresa
4. Martin Luther King Jr
5. Bill Gates
6. Mahatma Gandhi
7. Brad Pitt
8. Warren Buffet
9. Bananazஇ
10. Margaret Thatcher

I know, I know....I just have that special effect on people to go bananas ....one day you too can be like me...~;). Beleaf me! Whoa! Stop changing different numbers becoz I am still your favorite role model, just deal with it. Muahahaha!!!!
Bananaz giving credit to the original joker & tQ to LeeBC for getting me trapped.

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இ Years To Live¿

G~d created the mule, and told him, "You will be mule, working constantly from dusk to dawn, carrying heavy loads on your back. You will eat grass and you lack intelligence. You will live for 40 years."

 


The mule answered, "To live like this for 40 years is too much. Please, give me no more than 20." And it was so.



Then G~d created the dog, and told him, "You are dog and will hold vigilance over the dwellings of Man, to whom you will be his greatest companion and man's best friend. You will eat his table scraps and live for 30 years."

 
And the dog responded, "Lord, to live 30 years as a dog is too much. Please, take in mercy 15 years off my life." And it was so.



G~d then created the monkey, and told him, "You are monkey. You shall swing from tree to tree, acting like a clown. You will be funny, and you shall live for 20 Years."

And the monkey responded, "Lord, to live 20 years as the clown of the world is too much. Please, Lord, take off I pray for 10 years." And it was so.



Finally, G~d created Man and told him, "You are Man, the only rational being that walks the earth. You will use your intelligence to have mastery over the creatures of the world.  The power of thought and judgment shall be yours, and the capacity of disclosing your innermost thoughts by means of speech. You will dominate the earth and your life shall be 25 years." And the man responded, "What is the good of living in pleasure and in might, if all the years of my life are to be 25 is too little. Please, Lord, give me the 20 years the mule refused, the 15 years the dog refused, and the 10 years the monkey rejected." And the Lord granted his wishes.

So G~d made Man to live 25 years as a king and ruler over all creatures for the twenty five years which the Lord had given to him, in joy and in happiness, without care and without trouble until 25 years later..assing & working pretty hard for the money, barely surviving with all the back stabbing, woofing to keep the wealth protected & finally clowning with grand children¿. We hear fantasies from people wishing to be different and to be free of which eagle seems to be the most popular choice. A familiar popular El Condor Pasa says it all with "I rather be a sparrow than a snail..". Even 古巨基 Leo Ko in his song 愛與誠 wants be a cat or a dog than to be a lover. The singer desperately needs "love potion number 9"

"God gave us the gift of life; it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well" ~ Voltaire.

BAD JOKE DISCLAIMER: Bananaz recognizes that religious humor can be risky. It is my hope that by laughing at ourselves (and others) we can make this subject more approachable. If you find any of these objectionable, gross or irreverent I truly apologize. As with most jokes, the original authors are unknown - but we thank them.

A new trend has EXPLODED in China’s upper class where people are transforming their pets into miniature versions of animals, fairy’s or just dying them crazy colours but Pandas seem to be a big hit and obviously their favourite. It’s becoming a huge industry and people are spending thousands of dollar$ in professional hair dye, salon cuts, clothing, accessories and whatnot to achieve their desired 'animal' to their liking.

Its ain't easy even to be a dog, think again if you rather be a dog, though they are pretty cute. Received these pixz from daughter Nikki and  the source unknown.

20112011

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இ To Hear, Or Not To Hear

"If I could have only one of my senses then I would choose hearing, Then I wouldn't feel so all alone." ~ Helen Keller

"One third of our life is spent with our eyes closed, because we are asleep. An estimated twenty years. Yet in any second of those twenty years our ears can command our eyes to open and search for the source of a sound. When our eyes are open our ears can hear through walls, and all around where our eyes cannot see and still command our eyes to search for the source of sounds." ~ Jim S. Davis II, BC-HIS, ACA.

So now how important is your hearing? Have it checked.

Any sound above 85 dB (decibel) can cause hearing loss, and the loss is related both to the power of the sound as well as the length of exposure. You know that you are listening to an 85-dB sound if you have to raise your voice to be heard by somebody else. Eight hours of 90-dB sound can cause damage to your ears; any exposure to 140-dB sound causes immediate damage (and causes actual pain). More info HERE.

TELL ME THIS WON'T HAPPEN TO US!!!

Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine beautiful day.

One remarked to the other, “Windy, isn't it?”

“No,” the second man replied, “it's Thursday.”

And the third man chimed in, “So am I. Let's have a beer.”

Chinese Idiom: 掩耳盗铃*pinyin:yǎn ěr dào líng [lit. Cover Ear Steal Bell]

 掩 : yǎn *cover* | 耳 : ěr *ear* | 盗 : dào *steal* | 铃 : líng *bell*

 A thief sneaked into the house of Fan at night and saw a huge bronze bell hanging in the front yard. Since bronze could fetch him a good price, without hesitation decided to take it back home. However he faced a stiff problem as it was too heavy to be carried away. He then thought of another idea if he could break the bell into pieces that would solved all his transportation problem. With a first strike of his hammer it gave out a loud deafening bang which caught the thief by surprise and shook him terribly by covering his ears with both hands. At this instance he exclaimed "Aha the sound of the bell can not be heard when the ears are covered." He ripped off part of his clothes and scrolled them into two earplugs and stuffed into his ears. Through out the hammering in the middle of the night the banging noise of the bell woke up all the neighbours and he was caught red handed. The foolish man did not know that the only one who could not hear the sound of the bell was himself.

Image courtesy of  Baidu

This idiom 掩耳盗铃*pinyin:yǎn ěr dào líng* [To plug one's ears when stealing the bell] is used to satirize those who think they are smart but only deceive themselves. This applies to someone who does bad things and buries his head in the sand trying to pull a fast one in telling the world he is innocent.

"You have to hear what you don't want to hear, to know what you don't want to hear" ~ Dr. Gustav Mueller

 

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